Canine News
We have sadly discovered that our beloved Piper (the Punk), is not as perfect as we thought she was when she joined our family. We now know that she has a serious disability, and we are, of course, heartbroken that Pipes is not "normal" in society's terms, but we will love her and care for her as if she were like any other dog who looks like an alien baby, smells like she lives on a diet of beans, cabbage and broccoli, snores like a drunken sailor and thinks she is a Pugtreiver.
The Punk can't bark.
Every once in a while I'm in another part of our three level townhouse and hear, from the first floor, the sound of a gerbil being strangled (or, more accurately, the sound I think a strangling gerbil would make, never having heard a gerbil strangle). The sound is pathetic, very heart-wrenching, and it always catches me off-guard.
It's Piper, trying to bark. Like a dog. The alien baby is so determined to be seen as a real canine that she steadfastly pretends to be disability-free, but the sad truth is that the Punk squeaks.
Yes, she plays fetch, yes she loves bones, yes she loves her stuffies (and has a very disconcerting obsession with tree limbs and leaves), but she is more rodent than dog. Actually, no self-respecting rat would make a noise that lame.
The other dogs are fine. Madison lost 10 pounds, Kirby found them. Chunky hates Piper with a passion. MacKenzie-the-Shark is plotting a coup, Clio is Clio, sweet and simple. The dogs have us, beaches and one another, life is good.
Except for the defective Pug.
The Punk can't bark.
Every once in a while I'm in another part of our three level townhouse and hear, from the first floor, the sound of a gerbil being strangled (or, more accurately, the sound I think a strangling gerbil would make, never having heard a gerbil strangle). The sound is pathetic, very heart-wrenching, and it always catches me off-guard.
It's Piper, trying to bark. Like a dog. The alien baby is so determined to be seen as a real canine that she steadfastly pretends to be disability-free, but the sad truth is that the Punk squeaks.
Yes, she plays fetch, yes she loves bones, yes she loves her stuffies (and has a very disconcerting obsession with tree limbs and leaves), but she is more rodent than dog. Actually, no self-respecting rat would make a noise that lame.
The other dogs are fine. Madison lost 10 pounds, Kirby found them. Chunky hates Piper with a passion. MacKenzie-the-Shark is plotting a coup, Clio is Clio, sweet and simple. The dogs have us, beaches and one another, life is good.
Except for the defective Pug.
posted by Alphamutt at 1:03 PM
1 Comments:
i was waiting for a post about the pug and her "barking".
Post a Comment
<< Home